I’m still trying to figure out my schedule. (I’ve also been distracted, mailing wedding invitations and out of town, so there are those excuses on the table.)
Part of self-care is holding myself accountable in a way that is compassionate to myself, so I want to share that I changed my yoga schedule last weekend. Friday I skipped my evening session. Saturday and Sunday I skipped both morning and evening sessions. On Monday, I redid the morning session I’d completed on Friday. I’m at peace with the concept of this schedule. It allows my body a little more time to work on certain poses and familiarize my body with postures.
I missed my yoga sessions today (was in a hotel room without props and had to drive a couple hours home), so I will re-do yesterday’s sessions on Friday which is tomorrow for me. I’m excited to be repeating those exercises because it focuses on stretching the hips and quads. When I did the stretches on Wednesday, I felt like I was able to ease into hip stretches for the first time in my life. I used the bolster under my hips during pigeon pose. During low lunges I used blocks under my elbows. I was able to remain mostly present and focus on my breath throughout the exercises. Even more surprising was how easy it felt to listen to my body. I really think I’m growing from this schedule, even if I’m taking it somewhat slower than previously anticipated. That’s what deciphering a schedule is all about–figuring out what works and what could use more working.
Today, due to my couple hours driving, I felt discomfort in my sciatica. When I got home I tried using a foam roller on it, but that had no effect. I noticed while standing in line somewhere that when I stretched the front of my hip, I seemed to release tension that would appease my sciatica, but I wasn’t quite sure what to do yet.
Then, while browsing the brandy aisle in the grocery store (I needed it for some beef stroganoff I made this evening), I held onto the cart and seemed to innately grab my ankle and pull it behind me in such a way that stretched my quad, and consequently stretched my hip in the way I needed it stretched. Since stretching it there (which was over 6 hours ago), I’m completely relieved of the sciatica irritation. I will admit I’m sitting on the couch writing this in a very lounging position, so I hope the relief lasts. If it doesn’t, at least I know how I need to stretch.
In addition to the hip and quad stretches, I really enjoy heart-opening stretches. I can feel more strength in my upper body already just sitting in easy pose–I sit straighter with more ease. There have also been moments in those heart-opening stretches like bow pose where I’ve felt an urge to cry. I regret that I held myself back from crying instead of allowing myself to be lost in it–sometimes a good cry is healing for me. But I wanted to maintain my focus on my exercise for my greater good. I know I’ll have a chance to do bow pose again. Perhaps I can allow myself the release if the urge returns.
I feel like there’s much for me to learn about myself in my initial reaction to heart-opening poses. As far as the chakras are concerned, the heart chakra is tied to one’s feelings of love, compassion and empathy. For the last couple weeks (actually, since I’ve started this blog), I’ve been educated about my feelings toward myself. I’m finally accepting experiences and am gaining more compassion for myself around those experiences. I’m learning where I should accept fault and where it’s completely unnecessary. As a consequence of that, I’m learning what I’d inappropriately accepted fault for previously and how, in doing that, I was affected in so many other ways.
I recognize how process-oriented I am. While keeping sight of hopeful outcomes, I’m also appreciative of my own strength and determination to heal. I accept the journey of healing, however long it takes me.
May good things come to you always.